The Polyamour Chart for Human Resources

Satirical polyamory org chart in a corporate HR binder titled 'Employee Relations Policy 2026' featuring Kevin from Accounting, shown beside champagne glasses during a celebration.

The employee relations:

People exist as social animals that manage interactions between colleagues and managers. This includes anything from the onboarding process: love attraction of more than two cubicles, employee disputes due to jealousy for not participating in HR parties, and disciplinary issues of too much exposure.

They are also responsible for managing relationships with managers if everyone consents, even if it is a temporary employee or intern. An employee relations manager will operate to do follow-ups on polyamour relations within the office and to avoid any productivity disruption.

It is also their responsibility to ensure all employees and new hires understand their real position within each relationship and not to fall in love with the wrong colleague.

A FAQ will be provided for each employee and new hire with more details of this chart in order to promote inclusion, love, compassion, and a good work environment.

In case of pregnancy or sexual illness, the HR department will have to test all employees and managers for further responsibilities and compensations.

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