Donald Trump Is Tested By the Devil

Then Donald was led by his mental disease into the wilderness of his senile mind to be tempted by the devil. After eight, fifteen, twenty conflicts ignited and ended, he was dying. The tempter came to him and said, “If you are the greatest president of all, tell the deep truth of it all.”

Donald answered, “It is written: Epstein was the best friend of all, and he’s the reason why America is great again.”

Then the devil took him to the unbuilt East Wing of the White House and had him stand on the demolished building. “If you are the greatest president of all, throw a nuclear bomb. For it is written:

He will command his followers into a nuclear warfare,

And they will impeach him with their own hands,

So that he will not strike any foreign country anymore.”

Donald answered him, “It is also written: do not put my mind to a test.”

Again, the devil took him to the destroyed toilet of the White House and showed him his unflushed turds. “All these I will show to the world,” he said, “if you will bow down and worship me as you should and stop pretending to be the Christian you said you are.”

Donald said to him, “At least can I say goodbye to this world with my head on Mount Rushmore? For it is written: Worship my name, and America will be great again.”

Then the devil ignored the request and took him with him, and everyone forgot his name.

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